2017 October 24, Tuesday

Lunch: Pork steak and gravy with roast potatoes and broccoli, and a deconstructed trifle (advertised as chocolate mousse)

D has finally managed to get his own way regarding the plastic cutlery.  Having thrown tantrums and his plastic cutlery across the table for three meals running, he has been granted the privilege of eating with metal utensils.  Last night he refused to eat with plastic, and refused to even eat a slice of bread and butter since the carer had prepared it using the plastic knife.  So he had gone hungry.  I wasn’t present this morning when he did the same, I merely heard about it, however tonight he was eating with metal.  I can only assume that for the sake of peace the nursing staff have given up on him.  I do not think he would kill himself in the dining room anyway.

We have been in lockdown for over a month because of a norovirus infection.  This has meant that our little dining room - not the main dining room, but only a small extra dining room catering for up to 30 residents, and usually used by the more ‘compos mentis’ residents, (the more confused ones using the main dining room which has more carers on hand to ensure meals are eaten and the incapable are fed), has been invaded by residents trapped by the lockdown who would usually eat in the main room because of infirmity or confusion.  Seats at the tables are usually ‘owned’ and once one has been allocated a seat, it is theirs for good.  My table has several empty spots (fellow diners die, or move up the front) and we have had a succession of very old ladies eating with us these past few weeks.  One of them is nearing 100 and the others are in their 90s.  All are frail and have the air of being lost.  They can feed themselves if left to it, however most of the time they need prompting.  One in particular keeps asking what she should be doing, and asks if the food in front of her is actually for her.  She is uncertain as to what she should be doing (a common dementia trait) and continuously tries to stand up from her wheelchair.  This could be dangerous as she cannot walk far and could fall.  So, a meal is punctuated by continuous commands of Sit down, N!  Eat you food, N!  Another resident and I have been watching N to ensure she is getting enough to eat.  The servers have a tendency to not so much ignore or neglect the old ladies, but fail to notice that these silent old ladies are lacking say a cup of tea or something.  Since they lack the capacity to call out that they need something, they don’t get it. 

It is a sad indictment on the way things are that I had to tell a newcomer that if he wanted something that should be there but was’nt, he actually had to speak up - loudly - or he wouldn’t get it.  I overheard a confused member of his table blithely telling him that he just had to wait and he would get whatever he needed. The regular things are either already set on the table or are served as a matter of course, yes, but if you want extra bread and/or butter, say, or a new pot of tea, or are missing something, you need to speak up loudly. And repeat at intervals until received.